Be Thankful. Always.

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday - I love it more than my birthday, New Year's, Christmas, anything! How amazing is it to just spend the day making food for your loved ones, and the evening in their company around the table! No gifts, no fancy clothes, just pure love. I have made Thanksgiving dinner almost every year since the age of 16. Usually for about 10-15 people - I always had my friends and employees over with their families. This year, I am only making dinner for 3 people - my mother, my grandmother, and myself, so I decided to just make a chicken, to not be so wasteful. There is no way 3 people will ever come close to finishing even a small turkey in even 4 days. This month has been challenging for us, and I hope that Thanksgiving will bring some much-needed rest and calm into our situation. 

We were scheduled for a clinical trial after our 2nd brain surgery this October, and the FDA closed the trial because someone in another hospital had liver failure. Like a crazy person, I transferred my mother to UCLA's neuro oncology dept, and now we wait to see what clinical trial our 2nd tumor's tissue qualifies for. 

For the past 2 years, I have been savoring holidays, because of the sad realization that any one of them could be our last together. I take care of my little family nowadays. My grandma is 84 and my mom is 58, going on 27. I don't just say this because she is breathtakingly beautiful, even in her current state, after 2 months of daily radiation, a year of chemo, a year of physical therapy and clinical trials, and 2 brain surgeries... I say this because she has the most positive and young spirit out of anyone I know! It may sound crazy, but I feel like there is so much I am thankful for, even in my situation. I'm thankful to have two people who love me, by my side. I'm also thankful for the opportunity to take care of these women, and make them proud they have raised me to be a strong woman. Life is too short to only be thankful once a year... I'm thankful for my next breath, and their next breath, and I will be there with them until the last, because love gives me strength.